Fragmented reality

I heard this song recently and I've been feeling the exact same way.
The lyrics are:-
Well I guess it’s been a while

Since I’ve seen the sunshine
Since I have smiled
And me, who’s so well versed
Is feeling so damn empty
Is at a loss for words
Forgot what it’s like
To just to feel okay
I’m praying for the day
When there is no more rain
CHORUS:
And I don’t wanna do anything but cry

Well I hardly feel alive
I’m going through the motions
But I don’t feel like trying
The hole in my heart is growing bigger by the day
I wish that I could crawl inside
Hide away
BRIDGE:

Oh, I’m so low
I’m almost to the bottom
And oh, nowhere to go
Even my soul has left my body

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And again, every night, I'm trying not to feel the crushing weight of the depression. Even the numbness would be welcome.
And Im wondering if Im going for so many classes because dance is the only thing that takes my mind away from the soul eating problems of my reality.
And the physical pain is more than welcome. Pain is good. Pain reminds you that you are alive. An somehow it's so much easier to deal with than emotional pain.

Im sick of caring about losing people who dont even give a damn about losing me. I keep on running after like a stupid dog cause I think I'll lose them, but what's the point if the feelings aren't reciprocated. Maybe they aren't for me to keep. So Im just going to stop trying so hard. I will only do what's necessary. If they really want me in thier lives, then it's time they show it. Cause Im not going to prove my existence is necessary in thier lives. Let them decide on thier own. There's only so much I can do to try and save something that perhaps isn't meant to be saved.